A Change in Perspective

According to Mr. Webster perspective is - 4. a) a specific point of view in understanding things or events , esp. one that shows them in their true relations to one another b) the ability to see things in a true relationship. For most of my life I might have defined perspective as simply a “point of view.” Now in terms of my life - a change in perspective means - “reorganizing priorities.”

April 20th was another Monday in the work world. My mental to do list included a few urgent items and several important issues - a meeting to discuss the future of Health Care (HC) in Louisiana, a business trip on Tuesday to New Orleans, checking on Momma at the nursing home, putting Momma’s house up for sale by May 1, addressing problems between two cousins in a family business, cash flow (a perpetual concern), following up on the test results, new clients, catching up, etc.

The morning meeting on Health Care went well. As I was leaving town I stopped to visit Fred at his office. We visited about life, a specific technical issue, and the insurance industry. As I walked out of the door my cell phone rang, “Mike, this is Dr. Patout. Your test results are in - Mike, you have a malignant melanoma.”

I remember saying, “that’s the one I don’ want - right?” She responded, “Yes - Mike we think we got it all but you need to go to Dr. Walker as soon as possible.” My mind didn’t race - time actually slowed. My reaction was much different than I would have expected it to be. Cancer was not something I thought about much less obsessed over since no one in my immediate family ever had it.

Don - a dear friend, mentor, recovering addict, and very wise man - was down the street. I went to his office. He asked about the mark on my face - “had Sheila finally hit me?” I explained - Don, that’s a malignant melanoma. He summed it up quickly as he is wont to do. “Mike go back and read Tuesdays with Morrie. If this is a worst case - having time to say good bye has its advantages.” This shook me back to my current reality. Tim, David, Paul, and others left the world without warning. George, Phil, Will, and “Meats” had time to put their books in order.

“Mike, if they got it. You’ll do fine. Keep this in perspective. Pray the Serenity Prayer.” I walked to the car. I had more questions than answers - Should I tell Sheila now or should I wait until I know for sure? I decided quickly - I’ll wait. I worry better alone. Momma won’t be told at all. What about Slade and Seth? What about my business? What about tomorrow? What about eternity?

I called John - because if this was a worst case he and Deidre would be the link for my sons from their stable childhood to this new reality of uncertainty. I / we had been blessed with minimal crises in life to test our mettle or to make us stronger.

On May 11th, I got the news, “we got it all.” My priorities are reorganized - forever. I still address the urgent, now however, I celebrate the important. Thank God!

Copyright - Michael G. Manes (May 18, 2009)
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